school was okay today. hockey training was fun and tiring. some aching muscles here and there but that's about it.

the bus ride home today felt especially lonely. i don't know why but there was just this overwhelming feeling that i needed mommy and daddy to come fetch me from the bus stop. felt that i just needed them by my side. to walk me home at the very least. called home but no one answered. called mommy's hp and she said that she was bathing and hung up. so yea. walked home alone and saw daddy eating at the table. told him that i actually wanted him to walk me home from the bus stop. they used to do this when i was younger. sec one if i'm not wrong. but it stopped as i grew older. felt the need for independence and all that shit. however, today, i just wished i remained the littel girl i once was. maybe it's all the hmwk and blog spamming shit. i will not say that i am not giving two flying hoots to all that's happening around me but i'm comforted by the fact that there are ppl out there who love and care for me. was really sayang-ed when mommy told me that they still love me a lot. that was all that i wanted. just for a little attention, care and concern to be showered upon me.

daddy asked if there was anything wrong,.denied it but everything spilled out later on because i could no longer keep it within me. calling me a bitch, names and all. i don't really care. but i want more importantly is for my loved ones to be there when i need them the most, be it a shoulder to cry on or just a listening ear. told them all that has happened. what i hoped for weren't facts or live examples that are experiencing the same things as me but more of concern. not that they don't care about me.but it's not my fault that i'm called a bitch. it's not my fault that there are ppl out there who hate me so much. all i want is that all this will stop. i've had enough of all this shit.